Just got back from an amazing mini trip with my family. My husband took us to a place that my family and I went over 30 years ago. It was also the first place my husband and I went on our own for the first time after being married and I was tickled pink to be returning after many years. This is where I finished Geene Roth's book - I am sad to say, but I thoroughly enjoyed it and will miss reading it. She truly knew exactly how I was feeling. It felt good to know I wasn't alone or crazy!!! I will be reading it again! Any way what a great place to finally finish it and put some of what I learned to use ." We had the most perfect weather, the sun was shining, the birds were chirping, the bull frogs were bloooppping and I was with my family, what more could I ask for. . . Well! my son couldn't make it, so this was the first "family" trip without him, but instead of dwelling on it I decided to take advantage of this time with my daughter. She hasn't ever been anywhere without her brother, but we had fun. I had time to enjoy some nice conversation with my husband and found out stuff that I didn't know about him . . . hard to believe that after 24 years, there are still things I don't know. So it was nice to talk about just us. And every now and then we would look up to make sure Mar was still on the beach LOL!!! I discussed for the first time with him how I was feeling about my weight. He told me how he felt. It turns out that he doesn’t feel how I thought he did! This was a big weight off my shoulders. He wasn’t just saying it, I could truly see that he meant what he was saying. I learned a lot more about him and can't wait to learn even more. I had a very nice car ride there and back, I only slammed on my breaks once (I wasn't driving) which is a feat in itself. No panic attacks or anxiety at all. At times "The Voice" tried to sneak in and say "what is wrong with you, you are in the car and suppose to be clenching your fists and teeth and wanting to jump out while it is moving, what’s going on?"I simply told it to get lost and off I went to a better place. On this trip I also asserted my own will I guess you could say. I chose not to go fishing. You see, I am always doing everything everyone wants and I do enjoy it, but sometimes I realized that I may enjoy doing something else as well every now and then. So as much as I love fishing with my family, we had already been earlier that morning and I really wanted to relax and finish my book under the tree, so I said that I would rather stay back and they should go and have fun!!! Guess what???? THE WORLD DIDN'T COLLAPSE, and MY FAMILY DIDN'T DISOWN ME!!!! They were very supportive!!! It was rather nice for all three of us. Just in that one day, I not only did something because I wanted to and voiced my feelings, I stayed by myself in a strange place, and "The Voice" that normally would have told me I couldn't, shouldn't do it was no where to be found . . . What an accomplishment . . . "
Sunday, July 4, 2010
"MY NEW VOICE . . . "
Just got back from an amazing mini trip with my family. My husband took us to a place that my family and I went over 30 years ago. It was also the first place my husband and I went on our own for the first time after being married and I was tickled pink to be returning after many years. This is where I finished Geene Roth's book - I am sad to say, but I thoroughly enjoyed it and will miss reading it. She truly knew exactly how I was feeling. It felt good to know I wasn't alone or crazy!!! I will be reading it again! Any way what a great place to finally finish it and put some of what I learned to use ." We had the most perfect weather, the sun was shining, the birds were chirping, the bull frogs were bloooppping and I was with my family, what more could I ask for. . . Well! my son couldn't make it, so this was the first "family" trip without him, but instead of dwelling on it I decided to take advantage of this time with my daughter. She hasn't ever been anywhere without her brother, but we had fun. I had time to enjoy some nice conversation with my husband and found out stuff that I didn't know about him . . . hard to believe that after 24 years, there are still things I don't know. So it was nice to talk about just us. And every now and then we would look up to make sure Mar was still on the beach LOL!!! I discussed for the first time with him how I was feeling about my weight. He told me how he felt. It turns out that he doesn’t feel how I thought he did! This was a big weight off my shoulders. He wasn’t just saying it, I could truly see that he meant what he was saying. I learned a lot more about him and can't wait to learn even more. I had a very nice car ride there and back, I only slammed on my breaks once (I wasn't driving) which is a feat in itself. No panic attacks or anxiety at all. At times "The Voice" tried to sneak in and say "what is wrong with you, you are in the car and suppose to be clenching your fists and teeth and wanting to jump out while it is moving, what’s going on?"I simply told it to get lost and off I went to a better place. On this trip I also asserted my own will I guess you could say. I chose not to go fishing. You see, I am always doing everything everyone wants and I do enjoy it, but sometimes I realized that I may enjoy doing something else as well every now and then. So as much as I love fishing with my family, we had already been earlier that morning and I really wanted to relax and finish my book under the tree, so I said that I would rather stay back and they should go and have fun!!! Guess what???? THE WORLD DIDN'T COLLAPSE, and MY FAMILY DIDN'T DISOWN ME!!!! They were very supportive!!! It was rather nice for all three of us. Just in that one day, I not only did something because I wanted to and voiced my feelings, I stayed by myself in a strange place, and "The Voice" that normally would have told me I couldn't, shouldn't do it was no where to be found . . . What an accomplishment . . . "
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